Bomjour everyone!

I've had a lazy day today. I fact I've done nothing. I woke up at 2am,wrote my blog, watched a bit of Heros then tried to sleep again but no joy oh these steriods!

I've not left bed today, it's funny I know I should walk or at least do something - it's instinct but in fact it must be my body saing hold up - wait a bit and rest. So I am.. I actually have got up don't worry!!

Tomorrow Bernie is taking me to Meribel as New Generation have a small mid season party. I can't wait to see my friendsa agaim.

So,It should be fun tomorrow

Love

aLI

Bonjour everyone!

What is a brain tumour? I can't see or feel it but I know it's there. I wish I was back to me again but i'm not so I just have to wait until I guess I just get better. Thats is all I'm thinking of at the moment and it's what keeps me going - getting better. Well, better than this. Sue, Tom and Oscar came to see me yesterday and it was lovely to see little Oscar with so much energy. Oh I wish!

I do feel that I'm completely in the best place for getting better. Martin and Deirdre are tireless in their help throughout each day in helping me get better. Thankfully they are able to see the changes and constantly remind me of it to keep me going. It does , it helps tremenndously.
Yesterday was great. Jeanette came in the morning and we had breakfast together then I was offf to bed for annther sleep until 4 pn ish. Tom, Sue and Oscae came to visit, we had a walk up toward the next village and then came back - awesome!

It was great to see the Saxlund bunch on such fine form.

Then we had dinner and bed. It seems like I'm sleeping loads and I am. I'm waking at 2am and writing this blog then I try a get back to sleep for an hour or so then up for brekkie back to sleep for a few hours. Then lunch and a walk then a bath then bed again. Up (sometimes) for dimmer then bed again. We all know that sleep helps so I'm the first one to bed!

I'll be better - you'll all be part of that. We're fighting a good fight.........together. Thanks for being on my side! It gives me so much confidince to know you are there.

Love

Ali

Wednesday Evening

Bonjour everyone!

what a day! Im positive because I had a great day. It was very simple actually but ar rhe moment that suits me fine. I woke at 2am,fidgeted for an hour then watched a dvd for two hours. has any oe seen Heros? Well it kept me occupied! at 5am I tried to sleep some more but noj joy. Neber mind, Martin came in at 8 to get me. Cup of tea, grapefruit juice and muffin later I'm bcak in bed. I didn't feel like getting up so I didn't. Back to sleep amd I'm off until 1pm would you believe. Okay. fitness has sort of started now. Martin and I went for a 4 km walk!! It was along the cycl;e track, beside the river below Bourg St Maurice. What a beautiful wallk! I was so really tired my legs were killing but we kepy on going. Tunrs out Martin and I did just undet 4 Km. Awesome - it's started!! Getting fit. Yeah! We came back from the walk. I had a haircut (thanks Martin and no, the side bits haven;t grown back yet but THEY WILL!!!! THen I went to bed untul 10 30pm!! I needed sleep after that walk. I'm acuatlly really excited that the exercise will help me sleep through - wicked!!!

How do I feel? My vision is slightly better but I'm dizzy and out of balance as ever. That might be the tumour plukking on my vision bits or hopefully it will be a continuation of the radiotherapy. I hope it's that one!! Other than that I'm just tired and out of balance but hey -It could be worse. Much worse. At the moment it's not so I'm counting my blessings!! Best things today? Getting fit by walking with my great friend by the river. Yours

Love

Ali

Sunday Evening

Bonsoir everyone!

Hey folks I've had a good weekend. My eyes are still squiffy but I'm getting 'used' to things now. Oh how I wish I was better. It seems to be one things after another. Anyway we drove back to Meribel Friday evening (Jet and I) and stayed the night together. Saturday morning we drove to Courchevel and saw John in my apartment to see how he's getting on, then we met Maxim who came to value my apartment for selling it. We'll see how much or how little he suggests! Then we met Paul who needed a nights bed in Meribel then my good friend Jacques and Fracoise. I've been dreaming of the time that I met them again and it was no different to the dreams - excellent!

So, we drove back to Meribel had lunch with Paul which was super (okay so I shouldn't of had so much chocolate mouse!) then I slept for a few hours. I got up for another two hours then 'slept' through until 5am.

How do I feel? I'm really worried that I will stay this way for ever. I do not know what I'll do because I'm definitely an invalid right now - very dizzy. Nightmare! If It's getting better it's getting better really, really slowly. I'm dizzy, giddy and out of balance - massively. Someone wrote to me in November 'If you're going through hell - keep going' (Churchill) and I am. It's not a painful hell as you would imagine more a psychological pain of not knowing what is going to happen.

Anyway after a lovely drive back to Chalet Tarentaise with Paul (thanks Pal) I was really happy to get back to see and be with Martin and Deirdre again. Promptly to bed and sleep for four hours up for soup and for the first time I fancied a walk. So Martin and I had a stroll. Tomorrow we're going for a longer walk by the river. I'll talk some photos so watch this space...

Love

Ali

Friday Morning

Bonjour Everyone!

Thank you Dinga, Tom, Sean and Roy for making the two hour drive over to come and see me - I very much appreciated seeing them

I've just had a bath and feel brilliant! I tend to have baths a bit too hot and need constant supervision throughout. Thank you Phil (Happy Birthday Jenna) and Martin for being Bath Guardians and I'm sorry you both had to deal with my 'episodes' and perhaps see my bits!!

Yesterday Bernie, Jet and I went to Bourg and met Sian, Carolyn, Lotti, Gill and Tilda at Bazoom for a drink. Excellent!

I'm a bit nervous that my eyes and giddiness might stay like this. I guess it's the radiotherapy doing it's best so we'll just hang on I guess. Fingers crossed it gets better.

Love

Ali

Bonjour everyone!

Well Martin and Deirdre have been superb in looking after me because foe some reason I'm as dizzy and out of balance as ever. I can't be left on my own at the moment. Its good and bad because Deirdre feeds me good stuff and there are no shops in the village so I cant sneak a 7 up or sprite without her knowing. Jeanette. Martin and I drove up to La Rosiere yesterday -it was so good to get some fresh air and out for a chaf. Okay I might have looked liked Bill Oddies in that photo - so much so that I have changed it to Jeanette's little nephew's bottom - that is what I think of Bill Oddie!! He wont take offense I'm sure!

How am I feeling?

I'm a bit nervous because if I feel as dizzy and out of balance as this for the rest of my life, I'm not going to be fit for much. I hope this goes. I can't ski just now, I can't ride, drive and walking is really difficult. I've had to go up on ,y steroids. I don't mind or care anymore because I'm home and I should be getting better.

I've not seen many friends because my phone has been turned off. We decided that its best to sleep and get over this. By golly I've been sleeping. I should win some sort of award for sleeping!!

Love

Ali

Tuesday Morning

Bonjour everyone!

Sorry for not blogging for ages. I've been having so much fun and being looked after tremendously well by Martin and Deirdre. I have to do something about the photo of me that Martin posted - I 'm sorry but I do look like a county bumpkin. You'll be pleased to know that I have had a proper wet shave (it hurt like hell because Chris's blade was blunt).

Days go like this at the moment:
Wake up at 3am sharp. Fidget for an hour. Decide to watch a movie (watched Million Dollar Bay this morning - Excellent!). Then watch news till 08.30. Martin comes in with a cuppa and then we are up! Martin, Deirdre & I have brekka which consits of muffins, porridge & orange juice. See, I told you I was being looked after. Do my relaxation exercises, then back to bed. 2 hours sleep then up for lunch. All healthy. Out for a stroll in the sun and a hot chocolate somewhere in the village. Then back to bed. Up again for dinner and one of Travis's desserts.... Luverley!!. After that it's back to be until 3am.

I've still got a numb face and I still can't see properly so I've had to up the steroids to 14mgs. Damn. Not to worry Jeanette is coming to the chalet this evening Yippee!

Love Ali.

Good Evening.

It's Martin here. Ali is staying with us for a few days and has asked me to let you all know how he is getting on.

Although a little better today, his eyesight is very "squiffy" at the moment and he is finding it quite difficult to type. He was going to dictate something but the lure of his bed was too great!

He is in pretty good form but would like to see his vision and balance start to improve a bit. He also has some numbness around his face which he would like to see the back of. On the good side, he has been sleeping much better for the last few nights.

Two of Ali's good pals, Tom & Sean came to see him tonight which he really enjoyed.

Agenda for tomorrow is breakfast, short walk in the sun, coffee on a sun terrace, sleep, lunch, bath, shave (Jeanette is coming to stay on Tuesday night!), sleep, bit of telly, dinner, a visit from John & Carolyn, then off to bed again.

I'm sure Ali will be back in full "blogger" flow tomorrow. Meanwhile I will try to post a photo I took of him yesterday.

Martin

Friday Evening

Hello everyone!

I still can't see too well so I wont be long I'm afraid. Today was great, I woke up at 4am but felt that I wanted to sleep through and so I did! Normally I need to do something like go on my lapdog or listen to a talking book, but it didn't happen. Thats a big step for me. Each day I find little steps like that take place and it's normallly forgotten inless it's big. Jet notices how I am and the changes as well,

So, I got up at 8.30, brekkie, bed, up at 1pm, lunch, chill, we even walked outside and sat in the sun. It was simply lovelly just sitting in the sun just talking about things. Wow. Every day I hope to go out and do the same. If i can see more tomorrow I'll write more so I have to apologise for this meagre amount......;-)


Love

AL

Hello everyone!!!

I've got a bit of a headache, my hair has fallen out, my nose is numb, my mouth is really mettallic, I've put on a stone - we measured my waist, it's a metre round and my leg and arm muscles have wasted away. Do I care?

I'm home. I don't care because I'm happy at home.

The Farewell team (Rachel, Carolyn, John, Martin, Deirdre, Nix, Tom, Dinga amd Phil) came to visit us last night and have dinner. Martin cooked a wicked chilli and Carolyn cooked an awesome date pudding. oh, not to forget Nix and her salad - thank you.

I've been feeling a bit dizzy, giddy and generally out of balance. Jeanette will not leave me on my own when she goes to work. So, I'm going to stay with Martin and Deirdre for a few days and I can't wait!!

It just leaves me to say a huge thank you to my good friend Phil. from both Jeanette and I.

Thanks Phil (I found the chocolate!!!)


love to you all

ali

Ali is back home

Hi,

Ali is really tired at the moment so he wanted me to let you all know that he arrived home yesterday after a smooth journey. A massive thanks to Phil who embarked on the roadtrip with Ali and delivered him safely back to the Alps.

You know when you speak to someone on the phone and you know their smiling and happy, that's what I felt yesterday and certainly the best thing that has happened to me over the last few days. We are all hoping and praying that he gets better in France.

Ali hopes to be in touch shortly, watch this space!!

Live strong

Si

Bonjour Everyone!

It's 5am again and I'm waiting for the sun to come up again. My sleeping is still eratic and I know I'm not too well just by the way I feel. There was a close shave at the Royal Free yesterday! I met a new doctor called Sarah who was really nice but concerned by the numbness in my face. She wanted to bring forward my MRI Scan TO NEXT WEEK. How very dare she?! Think Shrink continues for a couple of months I'm afraid. I could do with your help.

All, ok because she phoned through to my consultant DR Wilson, and she wants to keep the date of my first post radiotherapy something or other , the same. We're all systems go for Monday. Yippee!Oh, by the way, Alison told us yesterday of a Grade 4 Glioma chap that was diagnosexd 4 years ago and is now back again driving. Grade 4 is the most dangrous of them all. Malignant. That was fantastic news for me because I really miss my driving. I really miss it. I'm sorry for being a back seat driver Dad/Jet for the last few months! Doh!

I won't Blog for a couple of days because Jeannette, Phil and I will be busy trying to get home. Now this doesn't mean you shouldn't visist the Blog if you don't mind! I've been checking the counter at the bottom and we've had more than 12,000 individual hits. Si and I, well Si set that up on boxing day. Stay with us please. We're on a journey, together.

I'm really quite excited right now because today I'm meeting the man who really taught me how to ski. More about that next time!!

Love

Ali

Thursday Afternoon.

Bonjour everyone.

I've just had lovely soup for lunch...MMmmmmmm. Carrot and coriander soup. Thanks Jeanette.

Never bite the hand that feeds!

We went to the docs yesterday just to check blood pressure and ask him a few questions about going away. See, I told you we were being sensible!

He asked me if I'm in any kind of pain. It made me think actually that I've never been in any kind of pain since day one (all those months ago) to right now. It's been more emotional pain than anything else. I really, really feel for anyone who might suffer through pain in all this, actually, it's been quite easy regarding pain, there hasn't been any apart from when I didn't have enough steriods and my head really hurt at Christmas time. That was PAIN BUT, there was MORPHINE! Cool!

Love

Ali

Thursday Afternoon.

Wednesday Morning

Bonjour everyone!

It's early wednesdayMorning and once again I can't sleep. I've had my quota of Tomazapam and I can't really have anymore. I could, but not yet!! Only kidding mum, don't panic! We're going to do the Great Escape sensibly, would you all believe? We've got an appointment with the Doctor tomorrow then we're going back to the Royal Free to see Alison on Friday (Radiotherapy Review Specalist). Once we've got the general all clear, Phil and I are heading off Monday morning. Oh how excited am I? I'm beside, myself with excitement. We'll stop in Annecy for Monday night then head up to Meribel For Tuesday. The 'farewell' team should be there Tuesday evening to welcome us back again. Yippee!!

I forgot to mention that Jet and I are in full flow for organising our wedding. Yippee!!! This is great because it takes our minds off things a bit at the mo. We seriously have the BEST BAND in the South of England! At Warrens wedding 10 years ago he had a band called Bonabrill and they were fantastic. I remember thinking that when I get married we'll try and have the same dudes because they were grrrreaaatttt! Well, we have! All booked - that was the first thing I wanted to do. Oh, we have no caterers yet. That's todays problem!
I'm stil not well yet. I don't expect to be for some time - I'm really, really tired. BUT, I can now be bothered to do some things. Fatigue is aweful, it's like you're a really lazy old man all the time. Many thanks to Jet, Si, Mum and Dad and Jo for going to do things that rightfully should have belonged to me! I'll be back doing them and a few more things - dont worry!

Love

Ali

Tuesday Morning

Bonjour everyone!

I'm sitting here in bed in Hertfordshire and it's really, really raining outside. Not to worry, it's less than a week before we head out to France. It's STILL snowing over there so the same thing I guess!!
We had a super couple of days down with Si, Jo and the boys. I slept all day Sunday but the guys were so welcoming and understanding to what is going on. Sleeep! Thanks guys!

How do I feel? Well, I feel better for the first time in months. My ears are still itching like crazy (that aqueos cream is awesome thanks Alison!), I can still taste the mettalic taste, sleeping at night is a mission although tomazapan is making a very small comeback and the worstthing is my balance . In a crowd I do feel like an invalid. Not for much longer though - that's down to all your support and help - THINK SHRINK!

Best thing yesterday? My good friend mailed the Arsenal`football club and somewho managed to get an a friend/helper into the first team training!! We get to meet the team and have lunch with them ha ha!

Worst thing yesterday? The only date available is when I get back to France!!

We're working on it - donta worry!!!!

LOve

Ali

Sunday Morning

Bonjour everybody!

I'm still in bed! Well, it is Sunday morning I guess. Best thing that happened to me yesterday? It's my Nephew, Charlie's Birthday later this month so I got him a red arrows flyimg suit. He loves it and wore it to bed because he liks it so much! I'm really happy about that. I'll post a photo that I just took of him and get rid of the......' Dead Mens' Fingers ' which is a sort of Sea Aneneme which Roy and I came across when Sean Kayaking just off the ummer Isles a few years ago...anyway, moving on! No-one got the right answer!
We had a great day yesterday as we drove from Jeannette's parents in Tunbridge Wells to Si's in Poole. I'm bored of being a backseat driver but happy to be one at the moment, if you see what I mean.
In terms of health I'm getting better each day. Thanks to you Thinking Shrink I feel better. Still a bit dizzy and my legs are weak but that's about it. Eyes not quite right, sleeping badly but we're nearly there. I can't wait to get better. I really can't.

Love

Ali