Bonjour folks!

I'm sorry for not writing yesterday, I was a bit too tired and I couldn't see as well as I'd liked to have to have typed much. I feel like I'm entering a tunnel. Don't worry, I can see the other side. It's just that I don't know how long it's going to be until I can get to the other side.
I know I'm coming into the stage when I'm going to have to go with the way I feel and accept that I'm tired and not able to do what I'd like. I've always thought that I'd be the first to jump up and do things but I just can't now. It's not very nice. You know when you've got a nasty cold (or Man Flu!) and you never believe that you'll be better again? That's how I feel just now. All I really want is to be back to normal again - skiing, running, cycling, bringing in the wood and everything that's normal.

One bit of cracking news today is that my steriods are coming down! This means that (don't worry Alison/Amanda/Dr Wilson!) assuming I don't have any headaches that I am dropping from 16 miligramms of Dexamethazone to 14 and dropping 2 miligramms per week until I finish them. Then I can have a pint of Guiness!

Ok, steriods. I hate steriods so much you wouldn't believe. I really need them at the moment because they keep the swelling down in my brain and they do a great job of that. The reason I had to stay in hospital a few days before Christmas was because I was vomiting the steriods without knowing. That was a bit close but the morphine was nice! Again, not for sympathy I just want you to understand what it's like on these things and how I feel just now...

I know I should drink more fluid but I really, really have to force myself. All summer I cycle and I drink huge quantaties of water. The steriods give you a mettalic taste - constantly so everything tastes the same. You should see how many cordials we have in the house! I don't want to drink but I know I should. Every night I wake up what must be 20-30 times and I'm as thirsty a you can ever imagine. My tongue sometimes is so dry it really is like a piece of leather.

The eating! Okay, I was told that I would get a 'bit' of a tummy and that it would show on my face a bit. It does! I've never eaten so much (I know I've blogged this before but it means a lot to me so I'm writing it again!) It's good that I'm coming down on the Dex because I really don't like the eating thing and although people say I need to put on a few pounds, I don't want to change at all from what I was before this.

There are a few more things which I'll tell you about next time. Before that I want to say a big thanks to Philip for the lift up to BuzzyMachine and the wait around! Thanks for John to come all the way over from Fulham to see us - great to see you again pal - better times wait! To my Jeanette for being there - as always.

Love

Ali